September 10, 2007
-
So Bin Laden has released another video and plans to release another one within the next couple of days. Is it just me or does this guy release more videos than Tupac? (I know its an old joke of mine, but what can I say, it still gets laughs). Of course, since President George W Bush has failed miserably in his pathetic attempt to catch him, Bin Laden has plenty of chances to make all the videos he wants. The thing about his newest video (directed by Abdul Mohammad Speilberg-Jhoabad) is that he has dyed his beard. Can you believe that? Bin Laden has dyed his beard, which is something so many of the “American infandels” would do so that they don’t look old. Geez, who would of thought Bin Laden would do something like that. I guess he has to look good for picking up goats to fuck. You know, he sure wouldn’t have been able to dye his beard had he been caught by President George W Bush, whose sad attempts to catch him makes people wonder if he was serious about swearing we would catch him dead or alive.
Bin Laden also says that Americans should convert to Islam. What a great idea, just think about all your brand of Islam has to offer. You can see the world, one stinky ass cave at a time. And why waste time showering when you can just go weeks upon weeks without so much as even seeing indoor plumbing, just imagine the smells you will omit, it will sure make you attractive to all sorts of wild animals. And I do mean ATTRACTIVE!!!And ladies, haven’t you always wanted the companionship that 8 other wives could provide? Just think, it will also solve all your wardrobe problems. You know all those times when you bitch about not having something to wear? Well, those days are gone, as you would be stuck in the same oppressive clothing every single day of your life. And don’t worry, guys will no longer be hitting on you, since you will no longer be allowed to have eye contact with them! What a world you could be living in.
I know I have always wanted my nieces and nephew to grow up and become a successful suicide bomber. What a great career that would be, after all, you wouldn’t have to worry about not having social security for your retirement. Think about your kid following in your footsteps as a suicide bomber…………….you know, just in case your bomb doesn’t work, he can come in right after you and kill everybody in the building. And what a paradise awaits, plenty of overbearing heat and with 72 virgin geeks from Beauty and the Geek waiting to pop your ass cherry! If that doesn’t say paradise, I don’t know what does. That should be enough for everybody to be grateful that President George W Bush didn’t do the job he promised and caught you. Think that’s it? Nope, there is much, much more.
Converting to Islam means I can no longer be gay! Yippie!! I mean why keep searching for a mate when I can just be forced into being straight by marrying 5 different chicks! Oh, I’m glad I’ve got the chance to suppress my true sexual desires, otherwise I just might be tempted to go looking for gay sex in airport bathrooms. Of course, just the mere mention of gay sex could result in execution, so I should just change the subject. Thank you President George W Bush for focusing on a country that did not attack us and posed a fake threat, instead of hunting down the mass murderer responsible for the deaths of over 3000 people.
Yes, radical Islam has it all! Just read the above, if that isn’t reason enough to sign up than you are just crazy enough to believe that President George W Bush even still cares about catching Osama. Ohhhh, yes, sign me right the fuck up, I can’t wait to start living my last 3 years in a constant state of looking over my shoulder and planning my own suicide.
See, the Bush Abomination wants you to believe that Osama Bin Laden no longer poses a threat and is impotent to attack us. Well, we all know that is probably not true, it still misses the point. See, to echo my thoughts from last year, we are now 6 years removed from 9/11 and regardless if he is a threat or not, he still has not paid for his crime. That alone should be enough of a reason to make catching him America’s top priority, not some phony bullshit war in Iraq. Even if he is not a serious threat right now, at some point he can be again and at some point, he can attack us again, and who knows how much worse it will be. And nothing can ever take away from the fact that President George W Bush is the person who is fully responsible for catching him. He and the Neo-cons and the Republicans can all say this is Clinton’s fault, but the fact remains that President George W Bush is the only person that has been president since September 11, 2001 and Bin Laden is still free. Is anybody else as outraged and disgusted as I am by this fact?
