June 10, 2008
-
In the history of sports there have been legions and legions of just wastefully stupid athletes. If I had more time I’m quite certain I could get a pretty healthy list of them right now. But instead I’m going to focus on the latest one: former Bears running back Cedric Benson. Now he has done stupid things in the past but none nearly as stupid as the past month and a half. In early May he got arrested for drinking and boating. And I’ve got no doubt of his guilt. Just look at his mug shot.
If that doesn’t say “I’m hungover, take the God damn picture already” than I don’t know what does. Ok, so operating a boat while drunk is bad enough. In fact, its pretty damn fucking stupid. Its not quite as stupid as drinking and driving though. I really thought that was enough but apparently there is no quota on stupid. So what does he do this weekend? He decides to drink and drive and you guessed it, gets a DUI. Here is that mug shot.
Is it just me or does he look like he prettied himself up for this pic? I mean, honestly, its more like a high school yearbook picture than a mug shot. Is he high as well, because that would explain it. Maybe he had a threesome and was very happy. Maybe this whole arrest thing is old hat for him and missed being in jail. Or maybe he is happy because he just got the 2nd leg of the Operating a Vehicle While Intoxicated Triple Crown. Now if only he could get arrested for flying a plane while drunk he would be set. Needless to say on Monday he became a former Chicago Bear. What a dope.
Sunday night was an interesting night. I went to bed at 12:30am late Sunday night early Monday morning. I had not even fallen asleep yet when shortly before 1 in the am I heard the smoke detector start to go off. At first I didn’t get up thinking for some reason that it wasn’t real. The laying there really only lasted for about 3 seconds though before I thought to myself “HOLY MOTHERFUCKING SHIT, I probably should at least get up” and with that I raced out of bed. As soon as I opened my bedroom door John opened his and got up as well. I knew there was nothing burning and couldn’t figure out why it was going off. Ohhhh, maybe a drunk Cedric Benson could race over in a fire truck to put out a potential fire. Then again, maybe not. Anywho, I digress. Our other smoke detector in the back part of the house was going off as well. We were in the middle of some pretty heavy storms and thought that maybe lightening had struck the roof. John looked up and could see that the roof was leaking right next to the smoke detector. You probably have put 1 and 1 together by now and realized that the rain water from the leak was going into the smoke detector. Since both detectors are connected in some way, if one goes off the other one goes off. That’s good to know. What is not good to know is that the smoke detectors are connected to the electricity. As we know from Sunday’s post, I’m allergic to being electrocuted. Now I should mention that in the part of the house where the leak is at we have a drop down ceiling. So there we were at 1 in the fucking morning fighting to get the damn ceiling tiles removed and trying to dry things up a little bit. What made it hard was that there is a hole in the tile where the smoke detector comes out. Removing it and the tile without getting more water into the detector was a bit tricky but we managed. It wasn’t until almost 1:30 when we finally got back to bed. And since I’ve always had problems sleeping, this certainly wasn’t helping what with the fear of a fire or being electrocuted with me.
Comments (1)
This proves my point in an earlier comment that getting the roof fixed is your first priority. Enough said about that.
RYC: The governor of Florida is not openly gay. Far from it. But several of his former boyfriends have said he is, he used to frequent a gay bar in Tampa and “act gay,” according to the bar’s owner, and he’s not married or dating a woman. Some of my friends knew him when he was Commissioner of Education, and they say he’s totally ADHD. He was Attorney General under JEB Bush. I think he’s a cool guy, and he opposes an amendment to the Florida Constitution making marriage exclusively between one man and one woman.
What really makes him important right now is that John McCain has him on his short list for Vice President. McCain hosted Crist, Mitt Romney, and Bobby Jindall (the newly-elected governor of Lousiana, a Catholic, and an ethnic India Indian) for the Memorial Day Weekend at McCain’s home in Arizona. Romney is a loser. Jindall is too new and too exotic. That leaves Crist (whose name looks a lot like Christ). Crist is very moderate, and he’s hugely popular in a very important swing state–i.e., Florida. The Republican V.P. could very well be Crist, and that could potentially be a God-send for the Democrats. I hope and pray Obama wouldn’t exploit Crist’s sexuality, but I’m sure others will. Like the religious right. Win it on a bunt, if you have to.