This year Chicago is the murder capital of the country. And as if to prove the point, Jennifer Hudson’s mom, brother and nephew were all murdered. It has been a stunningly heartbreaking bad year for Illinois and guns. First there was the Lane Bryant killings in early February in which 5 people were murdered in a Lane Bryant store in Tinley Park. Then there was the stunning shooting at Northern Illinois University on Valentine’s Day in which a man shot and killed 5 people before killing himself. Honestly, that one I took kind hard because I knew so many people who had gone to NIU at some point in their lives.

In August there was a tragedy in my best friends family that left 2 people dead due to gun violence. Out of my respect to my friend, I will leave out anymore details. And although I’m not really a fan of Hudson, I can’t help but feel for her especially after being so close to the situation with my friend. When I heard today on the radio into work that they had found the body of Hudson’s 7 year old nephew, I couldn’t help but feel sad and disgusted by it all. I still think about my friend’s situation and talk to him about it on a regular basis.

I’ve always spoke out against guns but until this past August it had never had anything that could bring it so close to home. My question is, when is it enough? At what point do we as citizens start to demand changes? And what changes could be made? Republicans like to talk big about being for families and kids and how they are against abortion because it takes the life of a child. But, what about after the child is born? They don’t seem to care then. I know what the NRA and other gun nuts like to say that guns save lives because having a gun helps you to protect your family. You can slice it anyway you want, I just can’t make sense that having more guns more accessible to people makes children safer. Statistic after statistic has proven that people who own guns are more likely to shoot themselves or a family member than an intruder. And here is a cold hard fact that these Republicans need to consider: guns have killed far more people than gay marriage; maybe they need to focus more of their attention on gun violence than gays getting married.

I know that the 2nd amendment guarantees the right to bear arms. But, its just that, an amendment which by definition is put in place to amend a contract. Now I’m not outright saying we need to give up our right to bear arms, after all we should have the right to defend ourselves. That being said, we need to take a closer look and reexamine this very important issue. I know there is a lot of American pride that refuses to accept that other countries might have something right that we have wrong but we need to look at other countries and see what they are doing right that doesn’t end up with tens of thousands of people being murdered each year. Our country worships the gun, just look around at entertainment. And toys. There is such an importance put on guns. Almost from the time a child learns to walk, guns are thought of as cool. Kids are given guns as toys and watch tv and movies that have guns. To have a gun is to have power, importance and invincibility. Why is it that people use guns to compensate for so much. Maybe for lack of brains or brawn. Maybe due to insecurity in themselves. Maybe because they are not well endowed. They use the excuse of guns to hide behind because they claim its for safety when in reality its about compensation and insecurity. If you need a gun to keep yourself safe, maybe you need to take a look at yourself and the life you are leading which requires you to carry or own a gun.  At what point do we realize that guns usually only end up in death or severe injury. Honestly, can you think of any situation in which a gun has lead to peace to everybody?

Republicans belong to the party of guns. Its like what Rage says “Rally around the family, with a pocket full of shells” as they spend so much time claiming to be protectors of children when in reality they can’t do the most important thing which is help keep children alive and out of gun violence. Gun violence should be another reason why Republicans can’t be trusted and should not be put into office.

Maybe then they will finally get it. And maybe the rest of America will get it too.

I recently read two Chicago themed non fiction books that took place about 100 years apart from each other.  One of them was Devil in the White City. I’ve heard a lot about this book and Kelli said it was the best book she ever read so I had to give it a read. I guess I should tell you what the book is about. Its all about the 1893 Chicago World’s Fair. I’m sure you have heard lots about this fair, it quite possibly was one of the most important events in American history. So many inventions and ideas came from this fair. Now I know what you are thinking “how could a book about a fair be interesting?” Well here is the catch. Turns out there was a serial killer on the loose in Chicago during the fair. It makes for a compelling read to learn not only about the killer but Chicago at that time. The book in all honesty did not live up to the hype I had for it, but it was still a very interesting book and worth reading it if you get the chance.

The other book was Bill Wennington’s Tales from the Bulls Hardwood. You probably don’t know who Bill Wennington is, but he used to play for the Chicago Bulls in mid to late 1990s. He was never all that good but he was always one of my favorite players as he seemed like a fun guy; you know kinda like your uncle. Although it was cool to hear some of the stories about the Bulls from back then (especially for a big Bulls fan like myself) the book over all was a pretty big disappointment.

Shit, its late. I’ve got to go.

So Sarah Palin says that the election is in God’s hands and she is sure God will do what is best for the country. So since its in God’s hands, do you think that her supporters should just stay home on election day and truly leave it in God’s hands? And when Obama wins, will it be because God did what was best for the country? I think somebody should ask her that if Obama does win.

Also have you heard that the campaign has spent $150,000 on clothes for Palin and her family in the 6+ weeks she has been on the ticket. They bought clothes from places like Nieman Marcus, you know, just like people from small towns. For somebody who is always claiming to be from real America and representing small town folk, does anybody else find it ironic that she would spend $150,000 on clothes when those very people she claims to be like don’t even make close to $150,000 in 3 years? What a fucking hypocrite.

You might remember that recently (see my September 10th, 2008 post) I made a plea to people to write their senators and representatives asking them why Osama Bin Laden has not been caught. I also sent emails to my rep and senator (one of my senators has been kinda busy lately trying to get a promotion) and was disappointed that I did not get a response .Well, six weeks later, I got a response from Dick Durbin. I have written Obama before and got a quick response and assumed it was just an automatic form response more than likely not actually from Obama. Although I think Durbin’s is probably the same, I also think it might actually be from him, as it would certainly explain why it took so long for him to respond. Also, he went into great detail which led me to believe that he took the time to research the answer. Nevertheless, here is his response:

Thank you for contacting me about capturing Osama bin
Laden. I appreciate hearing from you and
share concerns about this matter.

Before
we had accomplished our mission in Afghanistan ,
President Bush initiated an unnecessary invasion of
Iraq that has distracted our nation
from the vital fight against terrorism.
The fact that Osama bin Laden remains at large more than seven years
after our nation was attacked is a clear indication that we have much more work
to do.

Afghanistan continues to face
a number of problems that threaten both its immediate and long-term
future. An ongoing insurgency as well as
drug traffickers and other criminal elements have greatly hindered
reconstruction efforts. The remnants of
the Taliban and al-Qaeda have found a safe haven along the Pakistan-Afghanistan
border, and the tumultuous political situation in
Pakistan has made it difficult to
combat and control the insurgency.

We must refocus our efforts on defeating al‑Qaeda
and stopping the spread of terrorism.
This means going after terrorist leaders such as Osama bin Laden, collaborating
with other countries and international organizations as we work to uncover
terrorist cells, disrupting the financial and organizational infrastructure of
al‑Qaeda and similar groups, and preventing them from obtaining weapons
of mass destruction.

It is equally important that we embrace a
longer‑term strategy to win the war of ideas against Islamic extremism by
promoting human rights, representative government, and economic opportunity
around the world. The overwhelming
majority of Muslims reject terrorism. A
small, radical minority has grossly distorted the teachings of Islam to seek
justification for acts of terrorism. As
the 9‑11 Commission noted in its final report, “…Our strategy must
match our means to two ends: dismantling the al‑Qaeda network and, in the
long term, prevailing over the ideology that contributes to Islamist
terrorism.”

I will keep your views in mind as I
continue to work to keep our nation safe.
Thank you again for taking the
time to contact me. Please feel free to
stay in touch.

Sincerely, 

Richard
J. Durbin

United
States Senator

RJD/ds

Once again the Republicans have proved just how truly hypocritical they are. For months they have been running around saying that Barack Obama is an elitist. For years they have been saying that Democrats believe they are better than Americans. Yet, if you listen to Sarah Palin and many other Republicans, they like to brag about the “real America” and how life is so much better in the small rural towns and how they grow better people in those towns as compared to the big cities. Of course, these small towns are your typical flag waiving, God fearing, gun lovin Republicans. First of all, I had no idea that people were grown. Since I was about 12 I believed that people had sex and that is how people were made and were babies came from. Then again, Republicans have never been ones to believe in science and since they don’t believe children should be taught sex education, maybe the Palins of the world actually believe people are grown. And another thing, by saying how much better Republican small town people are, they are pretty much being elitists themselves. Then again, I should be careful how I throw around that word, after all the terms Republican and (wait, I should end this sentence now.) And elite should not be used in the same sentence. Technically this is a separate sentence since there is form of punctuation at the end of previous sentence and a capital letter at the start of the next  sentence.  Sure, I know  that is not  grammatically correct, but consider it an ode to Republicans small town people, seeing as most of them never went to college and don’t believe in good schooling. So lets take a look at how those people in those small towns just might be better than us city slickers.

The Chicago Tribune recently did an online poll asking people if gay marriage should be legal, yes or no. Now being a Chicago paper, I’m sure most of the respondents were from Illinois. But being a mostly conservative, Republican leaning paper, I assumed that the vote would be no. Well, 969 respondents said yes and 777 said no. Now I’m sure somebody who knows math can figure out the percentages…………..actually, if somebody who knows math wants to figure out the percentages for me, please feel free. Nevertheless, this poll gives me optimism that America is not as conservative as it appears to be. If the question was “should there be an amendment banning gay marriage” and 969 respondents said no, I would not have been surprised as I think most Americans do not believe there needs to be an amendment, but are probably not for gay marriage. But the question was should it be legal and the fact that a majority of people said yes, well I find that very encouraging. As one person wrote “when should people vote on others civil rights” which if you ask me, sums it up perfectly. After all, there was no vote to determine if heterosexual couples should be allowed to marry and no vote held to determine if interracial marriage should be legal. Another reason why this is important is that there is going to be a question on the ballot here in Illinois asking if we should hold a constitutional convention, which if passed would be a perfect opportunity for those assholes to try to write an amendment defining marriage as between a cock and a pussy. Last year there was a so called “Christian” group (because we all know how focused Christ was on preventing gays from getting married, hell I think he was so focused that he forgot to tell anybody about it) trying to rally up support and signatures to get the issue on the ballot. Well, I’m glad to say they failed miserably and didn’t even come close to getting enough signatures. Illinois is considered by many to be a liberal blue state and while we are, outside of Chicago the rest of the state, for the most part,  is red.

Speaking of the Tribune, they also endorsed the reelection of Democrat Senator Dick Durbin. In his previous elections they did not endorse him so this comes as even a bigger surprise than their endorsement of Barack Obama. For those of you that don’t know, Durbin is our other Senator, the one who has been in office for twice as long as Obama. A couple of years ago, Parade magazine named him one of the country’s top 10 senators. With Durbin being a mere afterthought compared to Obama, I’ve got a new slogan for him: Dick Durbin: The Other White Meat. Ok, so I guess that doesn’t make a lot of sense since Obama is known for being black but don’t forget, he is also half white.

I don’t know if I have mentioned it but I started a pizza club called the Chicago Pizza Club in which some friends and I go to a different pizza place every month. I named myself president of this pizza club. Although I call it the Chicago Pizza Club, we have yet to actually go to a pizza place in the city of Chicago. July was the first month and we went to Giordano’s in Naperville.  August it was Lou Malnati’s in Naperville.  September found us at Home Run Inn in Bolingbrook. And this past Friday we were at Giovan’s in Joliet/Crest Hill. This time we had the fewest number of people yet, only 12 people. They had a XXX thin pizza, which sounds thin and I was expecting it to be pretty much just a piece of paper with cheese and toppings. Although it was thinner than their regular pizza, it was not as thin as I thought it would be. We also had a pizza with meatballs, ricotta and garlic which we named the Lasagna Pizza. It was good, but not as good as it sounds. Much to my surprise of the 4 pizzas we got on Friday (we also got a veggie and Dave got a 6 topping pizza) the triple thin was the best. At least, I thought it was the best.

After pizza, we went back to my house to play Rock Band. And by we, I mean Mark, John, Jt and I. I don’t have Rock Band but Jt brought it over, he has been dying to get people together to play. I of course have no musical talents in the least. That meant that most of the night I was singing. When Mark or Jt wanted to sing, it meant that I had to venture out to play drums or bass. I should correct that, I don’t know if I would call what I was doing playing drums or bass. It was more of a way of giving Mark a chance to sing a lyric before John and I took all of us down. For the most part though, I stuck to singing which I was not only far better at then bass or drums but I actually excelled at it as well.

It was cool to have Jt over playing with us. There was a time when he was the 4th Consalvo brother but that was a long time ago and I didn’t know if this sort of thing would ever happen again. We wound up playing until damn near 4 in the morning.

Those of you out of the Chicagoland area might not know this but the Chicago Tribune endorsed Barack Obama for president. I’m not surprised, even though I’m a liberal I have read the Trib for years and they have long had great things to say about Obama. But this is very significant. In the Tribune’s 150+ year existence, they have never once endorsed a Democrat for president. Even more shocking was that today Obama got the endorsement of Colin Powell which is stunningly shocking. That one I didn’t see coming, as in addition to being the former Joint Chief of Staff was also the Secretary of State in Bush’s first term. Now I don’t know if these endorsements will actually make a difference, but I think it is a reflection of just how bad things are going for America and also how much of an uphill battle John McCain has in wining the election. That being said, I would not be surprised in the least should he win. I’ve said it tons of times, never underestimate the evil Republican’s ability to steal elections.

Last week I had a dream I was about to fuck a chick. She was naked, I was naked and I put the condom on and as she laid their with her legs spread open waiting for me to stuff it and and start going to town I looked at her and said “what do I do?”  All she said was “fuck the question mark” and I look down and there is a fucking question mark in her pussy. That’s right, a question mark. I kinda look down at it, puzzled as if to question why a damn question mark would be in her pussy. She again responded “fuck the question mark.” I was still more than just a bit miffed by this and she started to yell “FUCK MY PUSSY, FUCK THE QUESTION MARK, FUCK MY PUSSY, FUCK THE QUESTION MARK!!!” I then woke up.

So what exactly does a fucked up weird dream like this mean? My friends have said that this means that I’m questioning my sexuality and that I’m not gay and instead bisexual or maybe straight. As for me, I’m thinking am I really this uptight that I need to wear a fucking condom in a dream? I mean, its a dream, anything goes and yet I’ve got a damn condom on.

Of course I know that I’m gay. I’m 100% positive of it. And as far as dreams go, a couple of days later I had this dream about this HOT straight guy at work. As you might have guessed, it was a sexual dream and in it I was sucking his rather large cock. And I mean, large, it was so fuckin huge that it was comical. In the past I also had a dream that some older lady from work who is pushing 60 (and not exactly aging gracefully) was at my house masterbating. I never actually saw her masterbating but I knew she was. So, add all that up and honestly, I don’t think I can put much stock in dreams.

But fuck, I really want that dude now. I wanted him before but today when I saw him he looked even hotter and more attractive to me. Ooooooo, dreams are so much fun sometimes!

So this little town here in Illinois has just save a bunch of money on their road plowin by switching to booze. No, their drivers aren’t going to get drunk and then clear all the roads of parked cars and sidewalks of snow. Instead of using salt to melt ice and snow they are following the lead of alcoholic towns in New York, New Jersey and Connecticut by using a substance called Magic Minus Zero which is made from the by products of rum and vodka and mixed with some other shit which is probably magnesium chloride. The substance can remain on the pavement for up to 2 weeks. Shit, just imagine how fucked you would be if rum or vodka remained in your system for 2 weeks? Fuck, imagine the hangover you would have.

This is like a wet dream for booze hounds, all they need to do is get on their knees and in the street and start slurpin’! Of course then they run the danger of getting plowed while they are getting plowed. I guess one good thing is that if they throw up from drinking too much rum and vodka the plow truck will be along shortly to just push the vomit off to the side of the street. I guess that gives a whole new meaning to the term “pure as the driven snow”, don’t you think?

 I mean, who would have thought that rum and vodka melts ice? Shit, I’ve drank rum and coke before and the ice seems to never be melted by the time I’m done. Wait. Note to self, stop chugging my rum and cokes.

This stuff costs $3 a gallon which when you think about it is very cheap. I mean just try buying a gallon of rum or vodka in the stores, even the cheap shit has to probably go for $10. Ok, to be honest, I have no clue how much a gallon of vodka or rum would cost all I know is that the times I have bought a bottle that wasn’t a gallon it seemed to be a lot of fuckin money. Maybe if I tell them that I’m not going to drink it but instead going to use it to melt ice they would give me a deal.

Which brings me to this, do you think they card you if you are buying it to melt ice? Honestly, wouldn’t you at least have to prove that you are old enough?

Just imagine your town has just been blanketed with a foot of snow, who better to ride in and save the day than Captain Morgan? You look out your door and the booze is flowing aplenty from the back of the snow plow. This would give you another reason to follow that plow, I mean its spewing free booze. I would think this would make the plow trucks a target. The mafia has been raiding booze trucks for years, now all of a sudden they are going to start raiding plows? They drive the plow up to the back of the bar and everybody puts their glasses at the bottom of the plow and fills up. Or maybe people are getting in “accidents” with the plows, just so that they can have them stop to get their booze.

The way I see it, the world is kinda starting to go topsy turvy. Nowadays instead of eating corn, we are putting it in our cars. And instead of drinkin booze, we are putting it on our roads. What next, are we going to start swimming in milk and using water to build houses? Are we going to start eating boxes and using bread to move shit around? Really the whole thing is pretty damn funny. I guess the in thing is to start trying to find multiple uses for things. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to run, I’m trying to come up with a way to use my computer to have sex.

Much thanks to Randy for givng me the newspaper article.

For whatever reason I seem to always come up with my best ideas and thoughts while in the shower. Maybe its because I’ve got no other distractions such as tv, phone, radio or anything to read. And with nothing else to do for the 10 minutes I’m in there and being that washing my body is about as easy and mindless as it gets, the wheels always seem to start moving. Yesterday I came up with this while in the shower, sung to the tune of “Take Me Out to the Ballgame“

“Let’s all vote for Obama
Let’s all vote for some change
Buy back the stinkin’ economy,
I don’t care if he is half black
Let’s all vote, vote vote for Obama,
If he doesn’t win than its a sham,
For its one, two, three votes for Obama
at the old election.”

Ok, I’m well aware this is not all that good. But, this is what I came up with in 10 minutes in the shower.

I also thought about something else as well. Republicans of course are always the ones who are the most religious and claim God and Jesus as Republicans. And although I think most of them are full of shit and are just pretending to be Christian to get votes, I realize that they have to believe in God. And why is this you ask? Well, they have to believe in God to believe in Satan. And they have to believe in Satan so that they can sell their soul to the devil to win and steal elections. Right now as we speak, Obama has anywhere from a 6 to 11 point lead in various polls including a shocking 7 point lead in a FOX News poll. Yet, I’m still not convinced he is going to win. Of course, one of those reasons is that the Democrats always have a way of fucking up elections that they can’t possibly lose, you know, kind of like the Cubs. But also, Republicans have a way of stealing elections too. Although Obama has done a good job of growing his lead the past few weeks (although undoubtedly the rapidly sinking economy has a lot to do with that) it is still within the margin of error for the Republicans to steal this election. Never underestimate the depths the Republicans will sink to win elections. After all they are pure, black as charcoal evil.

I would never vote for a Republican on any level. I used to not always be that way but the Bush Abomination has soured me so much that I have vowed to never vote for another Republican ever again. They are so evil and so shady that they can never be trusted. Ever.  Ok, I guess there is one office in which I would consider voting for a Republican and that office is coroner. In fact, I will probably always vote for a Republican for coroner. See, Republicans are sexual deviants. Its always the Republican who is caught doing something shocking sexually such as trying to get underage pages to sleep with them, picking up men in the airport bathroom or doing crystal meth with a gay male prostitute. Now just what the hell does politics have to do with the office of coroner? Coroner gets the body, investigates the death and issues a death certificate, not much politics involved in that. Now why would I trust a Republican with my dead, lifeless body you ask? Well, being sexual deviants, they are more likely to try to fuck me after I’m dead. And honestly who does not want some sort of action after death? The way I see it, I don’t get nearly enough action while I’m alive, the least I can do is get some when I’m dead. And Democrats, their sex scandals are fairly normal, they cheat on their wives, they visit prostitutes, they usually don’t do things that are disgusting. If they are gay, they are openly gay. Republicans they are closet freaks who like some pretty fucked up creepy shit. Therefore they are more likely to give me a tug while I’m dead. And my theory is why should my sex life end just because my life ended? Republicans give me the greatest chance at post life sex. And I really don’t give a shit if they want to fuck me while I’m dead, after all, what do I care its not like I’m going to get an STD or something like that.

So, vote with your head by voting Democratic in the upcoming election. And for coroner, vote with your cock and vote Republican!

The big news over the course of the past couple of weeks was the big ass bailout that Congress and the president gave Wall Street. Of course a lot of people rightfully mentioned that we would be able to afford the bailout more if we were not in Iraq. But one thing I think everybody has over looked was the economic stimulus package that was passed earlier this year. I said it then that the rebate was bullshit and we never should have got it and agree even more now. First of all its obvious the damn thing didn’t work. And now, we are even worse off than before and need to spend more money to help try to get ourselves out of this mess. And I’m not saying one side is more to blame than the other as both Republicans and Democrats fucked this one up. We would have more money to work with and the national debt would not be as bad as it is if we had not gotten that refund.  But all I’m asking is for people to remember that refund they got earlier this year and ask them if it was worth it.