June 28, 2011
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Where’s Your Crown King Nothing?
I didn’t get a chance to comment on this because I was on vacation, but better late then never. Unless of course you are Lebron James. In that case, hopefully better never than ever. My plane just landed in Orlando when I found out that the Dallas Mavericks had beaten the Miami Heat in the NBA Finals. This made me so happy I could have shit and jizzed at the same time. See, I hate Lebron James and the Miami Heat. And I’m well aware that just by posting about them, I’m giving them more attention than they deserve. But, see, I just hate them that much. They are so fucking arrogant and have a sense of entitlement about them. Fortunately for them they didn’t need to win the championship because they had a championship party last summer when Chris Bosh, Dwayne Wade and James signed with the Heat. Mind you, this was before they even played a game together.
Then throughout the season, they had the smug attitude that they not only had already won the title, but that they were entitled to automatically win it. Even during the NBA Finals while they were down in the series, James and Dwayne Wade mocked the Mavs Dirk Nowitzki by pretending to be sick on the way out to the court (Nowitzki had been sick during an earlier game in the series). The Heat never won another game after that.
Scottie Pippen recently caused quite a stir when he said that Lebron James was better than Michael Jordan. I have to say I agree with Pippen. I mean, James is clearly the best ever. Shit, back in Jordan’s day, they played four quarters, nowadays James is so great that he doesn’t even have to show up for the fourth quarter.
Now I know James has a seven year contract with Miami, but if by some miracle he never won a championship in Miami I would be so happy that I would indeed have an erection lasting longer then four hours. Normally I don’t like to take joy in the misfortunes of others, but he is such a self centered, narcissistic, self involved, pompous ass that he got exactly what he and his team deserved. Plus, it’s not like it’s actual misfortune, I mean he still played in the NBA Finals, is probably the best player in the world and has more money than anybody knows what to do with. Doesn’t sound like misfortune to me.
