December 31, 2005

  • I was supposed to go out with some co-workers tonight because today was
    the last day for this one lady that I work with, but she backed out at
    the last second. This is the second time this has happened this month
    (we all were supposed to go out for another lady's last day a few weeks
    ago), so it sorta sucks. So, I wound up staying in and watching my new
    Goodfellas special edition DVD. Damn, that movie is so fucking good. It
    is, after all, my 2nd favorite movie of all time (right behind Spice
    World. Ok, just kidding on that one). There was some good extras on the
    dvd, but not as much as I expected. It really made me appreciate the
    way the movie was filmed.

    It got me thinking, though, what would the mafia be like today? Sure,
    there is the Sopranos and sure, there might still be a mafia in some
    form out there. But, what would today's mafia be like? For example, do
    you think they would be doing a lot of internet crime? You know,
    instead of high jacking a cigarette truck, maybe they would just steal a
    bunch of shit off of e-bay. And instead of meeting in some secret
    location for a sit down, they would just go into some mafia chatroom
    and have "virtual sitdowns." And when it comes to deciding who gets
    whacked, they do some sort of reality show contest. Maybe they can call
    it "Who Wants to Get Whacked by a Mafia Millionaire?". Of course, they
    would have big Texas Hold-em tournaments, that's a given. But, in
    addition to dealing drugs, they would also be selling steroids to
    baseball players. I just realized, for a post about the mafia, I'm not
    using the F-word nearly as often as I should. And if the fucking mafia
    were still fucking prevelant, there would be no motherfucking priest
    molesting scandal in the fucking Catholic fucking church. Fuck no. And
    when they did fucking whack somebody, to prove the person was dead,
    they would fucking take a pic with their cell phones (or take a fucking
    video) and show it to the mob bosses. "See, we fucking whacked Frankie
    the rat, and I have pics and video to prove it!" And nothing proves
    your loyalty to the family like a mafia tatoo. They would also be in
    the motherfucking satellite tv racket, getting a cut of every satellite
    put up in the area. And for updates on mafia goings on, you could
    always check their websites or The Don's blog. Now, I know what you are
    thinking "Mike, you are a fucking dumbass, they would be caught so
    easily if they did all of this" but use your fucking imaginations you
    motherfucking cocksucking mutts!!!

Comments (2)

Comments are closed.

Post a Comment