July 9, 2006

• Today was Dave’s favorite day of the year: the day we go to the Taste
  of Chicago. Its also the only time we let him drive, and on that note,
  his driving is not nearly as scary as it used to be, although I could
  have done without him playing poker on his phone as he drove. In fact,
  the rest of us (Kelli, Steve, and me) could have done with out that, so
  much that we all insisted rather emphatically that he stop, especially
  since he only sees out of one eye. Anywho, back to the story. They had
  to drop their daughter off at his mom’s house and since she lives by
  me, I had him pick me up for a change. When I spoke to him at 10:30 in
  the AM, I told him I still needed to exercise, shower and go to the
  bank. He asked me if I could skip one of those, because he claimed that
  Steve would be at his house at 11:45 and that they would be at my house
  by noon. Of course, I knew this would never happen, so I still did all
  3 things, but I didn’t take as long as I normally would take in the
  shower. They arrived about 12:30. Bastard. I swear, he is never on
  fucking time, even if it is his favorite day of the year.

  Even though traffic was fine, the ride there seemed to be endless, I
  think it was because I was so damn hungry. I didn’t eat breakfast
  because I knew I would be eating my ass off at the Taste. Of course, we
  also had to stop at the gas station, so that delayed things even more.
  Still, we wound up getting into the parking garage about 1:20. We got
  out of the car and grabbed some pops and water from a cooler in the
  trunk. As we walked away from the car, some guy told us that we had
  left the driver’s side door open. I should clarify this. I left the
  door open. I was sitting behind Dave and when I got out, for some
  reason or another, I didn’t close the door. Sure, this sounds bad, but
  Dave has a long history of doing shit along those lines to Jt and me.
  Kinda like the time we were at a bar listening to our friend play (he
  sang and tottled his gee-tar……….geez, that makes it sound like
  country music, which it wasn’t) and Dave went out to Jt’s car to pass
  out. 45 minutes later, we walk out and Dave was passed out in the car
  with the door open. Anywho, I digress, back to the Taste.

  We walked right up and waited in line to purchase tickets. I told the
  girl behind the counter I wanted $28 worth and handed her $30. She
  asked me if I had any singles so that she didn’t have to give as much
  change back. This puzzled me deeply but I told her no. She then gave me
  a $10 bill back and I told her it was too much change. Turns out, she
  thought I was only buying $21 worth, but that still doesn’t explain the
  $10 bill. Perhaps she was drunk.

  Every year, the first thing we always get is pizza. Being that this
  event took place over 8 hours ago, I have no recollection of what the
  first thing we ate was. You should make this part of the story up for
  yourself. Actually, when I think about it, reading all about the food I
  ate is probably boring. So, I will skip it, just have you know that
  most of the food rocked.

  There is a water ride at the Taste which I have always wanted to go on.
  We got up to it this year, stood next to it like we always do and let
  it splash us. Ok, so Dave and I were the only 2 that did that. Still, I
  really wanted to ride it and started a campaign to get at least one of
  them to do it with me. It did cost 7 tickets, but shit, its a water
  ride. The campaign turned out to be futile, although Dave wanted to do
  it and would have done it if Kelli agreed.

  Each year at the Taste, they have these high divers that put on a
  cheesy little show and whatnot. Kelli really likes it so we always
  watch. I couldn’t find it anymore boring, except that the guys have
  just swimmer’s trunks on and have GREAT bodies.

  After the diving show is when we ran into Scooty, Kris and her 4 kids.
  Dave later said that it seemed as though Scooty couldn’t be anymore
  annoyed to have seen us, and I too feel this is an accurate assessment
  of the situation. I did ask them if any of them wanted to ride the
  water ride and of course, the kids all said yes and Scooty and Kris
  said no. I told them I would take the kids, but they wouldn’t let the
  kids go. Fuckers. What’s a guy gotta do to ride a damn water ride?

  One of the great and also annoying things about the Taste of Chicago is
  that it brings out a diverse and wide range of people. People playing
  buckets, people doing all sorts of things. Others promoting the
  legalization of pot (yeah, when is that going to happen anyway?) Of
  course, there was also the bible nuts who like to tell us we are going
  to hell. One guy was passing out large million dollar bills, which once
  you took them, had a whole bunch of  crazy Jesus shit on them. I
  told him I didn’t want it and gave it back to him. He then told us
  something along the lines of “Fine. At least I will be going to
  Heaven.” Whatever dude. I really wanted to debate him, but there was
  lots of food to be eaten. Later, we came across a couple of teens that
  had a large sheet that read “Ask us why we are here.” I didn’t need to
  ask why to know, but I did anyway. In fact, I walked right up and said
  one word: “Why?”. The kid gave me some response, “blah blah blah
  something great, we just want to get people’s views on life.” I don’t
  know, I really wasn’t paying attention. So I asked him if he thought
  that chocolate ice cream was great and he said “I sure do, but it isn’t
  as great as God.” I quickly said “Who? Thanks guys, later” and walked
  off.

  We then ran into Scooty again. We talked with him for a few minutes and took a few pictures before moving on to the next thing.

  That was pretty much it. I can’t remember anything else. What is it
  about gorging myself on mass amount of food that makes me forgetful.

  • 1:31 am
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