May 15, 2008

• I saw an email today that was something along the lines of Jesus loves Texas. This got me to thinking. Why are people always speaking for Jesus? They are always saying things like  “Jesus loves you”, “Jesus forgives”, Jesus would be a Republican, Jesus would be against abortion, Jesus would disapprove of gays, or Jesus would use Dr Scholl’s for his sandals what with all the walking he does. If I were Jesus, I would be fuming pissed that people were speaking for me (that is assuming there is a Jesus………….remember, you know what you do when you assume: you make an ass out of u and everybody else besides me). If I were Jesus I would come back and sue the ass of so many of these fuckers. And you best be worried because if Jesus is as powerful as they say he is than he has got to have one HELL of a legal team. Still, people go on and on and on and on and use Jesus to say or sell anything. They pimp out Jesus like he is a $4,000 hooker. And does Jesus see any of this money? Noooooo……………..that actually makes Jesus a slave. They whore him out and don’t pay him. They use him to make money and gain power, put words in to his mouth because he can’t speak for himself and work him like a dog.  I’m sorry but in this country we have a name for people like that: illegal immigrants!

  Now I know that they get information from the bible. But let’s face it, the bible is the equivalent of a tabloid for Christianity. The stories are all based on what people have said or learned about Jesus. Its all hearsay. Just think, would a story you read in the National Enquirer about Angelina Jolie hold up in the court of law? Fuck no! So why do they hold up the words of Jesus as said in the Christian Enquirer hold up? The way I see it Jesus can no longer be used to sell or say anything unless he comes back to say it for himself. That means no more political endorsements, you hear me you dumb fucking Republicans. Besides if your Jesus was as smart as you claim he is, you really think he would be dumb enough to get involved in politics? Besides, according to 25% of you, he is coming back sometime in the year 2007, so you won’t have to wait long to ask him his views on these things. Oh wait. I must have missed this. Its no longer 2007. Wait………….what’s that? In fact, we are nearly 6 months into 2008? Boy, I bet you 25% really feel like dumbasses. Then again, I’m sure even more of you believe that he is coming back in 2008. Either way, you can’t sit here and pretend to know what he would believe or what he would say or who he would like. He was a man who may or may not have lived like at least 30 years ago. You can’t speak for him. How would you like it if 10 years after you died I went running around saying that you liked gay sex? Wait, bad example, secretly most of you do like gay sex. All I’m saying is that you stop whoring out Jesus and we’ll stop telling people you actually care about the planet.

  Big news today. The gay marriage ban in California was overturned! This is HUGE. What makes it even bigger is that it was a Supreme Court with a Republican majority that overturned the ban. Also with the biggest state in the union overturning it, this very well could have reverberations around the country. That being said, its important that gay marriage advocates don’t get to arrogant. After all, as recently as 2000 61% of voters in this very liberal state approved a defining marriage as one man and one woman. And we should never underestimate the power of the Republicans to bring out their base. They will try to get it on the California ballot in the November election to vote on an amendment defining marriage as a union between a man and a woman. And, you can bet that other states will try to follow suit. My hope is that this doesn’t propel John McCain to victory much like the same issue helped re-elect Bush in 2004. So in the short term, this is a great thing, in the long term it remains to be seen. Will there be a backlash that only makes things worse for gays? I hope not. That being said, I firmly believe that gays had to try to get this law overturned regardless of what happens later. As the saying goes, the wheels of justice turn very slowly. Once they get going though, they can be tough to stop.

  • 9:45 pm
  • 2 Comments