This lady at work showed me a picture of her boobies. First she came up to me and showed me a picture of her dad. Then she asked me if I wanted to see a picture of her boobies to which I had a bit of a shocked look on my face. It turns out that she was talking about her kids. She is black and she said that black people call their kids their boobies. Another white lady was in the vicinity at this time and she said that she has heard kids referred to as boobies before too. Now maybe I’m out of touch with what is in nowadays, but has anybody heard of somebody referring to their kids as boobies? Maybe it is a black thing and if so, than holy shit, blacks and whites are far more different than I ever could have possibly imagined. I mean, boobies? Honestly, I ain’t ever heard of that. Obviously where I come from, boobies is something else. Where I come from boobies can help lead to making kids. It begs the question if blacks call boobies kids, than what are boobies called?

This just in (and thank you very much Jamie for the post) apparently there is a Masturbate-a-thon. Check out the link:

http://www.masturbate-a-thon.com/

I would post more about it but……………well, with this being National Masturbation Month, I’ve don’t have enough time on my hands to post more.

First of all I should warn those of you that might read this at work, but I have added a song that might not be……………..er…………..work appropriate. Its from the South Park movie and its called “Uncle Fucka”. Now I have never been a big South Park fan, but this song is just funny as hell. I first heard it years ago when Tom and Julie brought it when we went camping one year. The song became the anthem of camping that year and by the end of the weekend we were all singing it. Because of this it always reminds me of Tom and Julie.

Can somebody explain to me why it hurts to get hit in the balls? I know this sounds like a simple enough question but honestly what is it about the sack of balls that hurts so fucking bad? Why is that area of the male anatomy so much more sensitive than any other part of the body. I mean, I’m sure that a doctor can explain this one to me, but I still want to know why. And no, I haven’t been hit in the junk recently. But I am a guy and let’s face it, every guy has been hit there more than once, so we can all relate. And it doesn’t even have to be hit hard, just a slight glance of a blow can really really hurt. Of course, the ironic part is that how can a part of the body that provides so much joy and relief also cause so much fucking pain? And it doesn’t matter what age you are, getting hit in the balls always hurts. And it just seems like I have been hit there more than the average guy. Of course, I’m quite certain I’m over exaggerating on this one but I think its just because of how bad it hurts and how easy it is to hurt them. When I wear jeans all I have to do is sit down in the wrong way and, as I like to put it, I crunch myself, meaning that I manage to crunch the both of them together. I haven’t done that one in a few months, but when I do…………..boy does that fucking hurt.

You know, I think this all may be too much info for all of you. You probably don’t need or want to read anymore.

So I’m going to continue on about my balls.

Just kidding.

I know most of you aren’t basketball fans, but you have got to see this clip of Lebron James and his mother during tonight’s game.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hl_9z35fz54

Because I was watching the game off and on, I saw it shortly after it happened. He was fouled hard by Boston’s Paul Pierce and in the landed in the stands. Well, Lebron’s mother who was in the 2nd row right near them took offense to the foul and started to go after Pierce. The Celtics Kevin Garnett gets in between and basically tells her to calm down in a nice way. Lebron on the other hand, wasn’t so nice about it. It was classic, kinda reminded me of Allen Iverson’s mom going nuts when a player fouled him hard. Good stuff. Just look at this pic of Garnet holding her back, it almost looks like he is trying hard not to laugh. Then again, I can’t blame him, I would find it funny too.

Meanwhile Lebron doesn’t find it funny in the least. Its almost like when you were a kid and you are arguing with your mom and your friends just sit there laughing at you. I wonder what he said to her after the game.

Why do I always manage to like straight guys? Once again, I have
developed a crush on a straight guy I work with. I know I’ve got no
shot with him, but why do I still like him? I’ve only made this mistake
a million and one times in my life but why do I keep doing it? And
worse yet, I’m powerless to stop myself. I know its bad and even to an
extent self destructive, but yet I still do it and try to become
friends which makes it even worse. I have fallen for straight guys a lot, some harder than others. Now I can assure you right now this is just a crush but previous times with other guys its been more than just a simple crush. You think I would learn. And although I know I shouldn’t even bother being friends with him and try to distance myself from him. But instead, I do the exact opposite. And no, he doesn’t know I’m gay (although, I think he might suspect as much) and I think it might scare him off if I told him that I crush him. I mean, we aren’t that good of friends outside of work so its not like the opportunity to even tell him would even arise. Also since we are not that good of friends, I see no reason to even tell him. But still, its frustrating that I keep making this same damn fucking mistake over and over.

Friday night I went to play cards with a guy I work with, some of you might remember him as the Christian dude who sometimes dresses like me. Or, sometimes I dress like him. I dunno, either way we sometimes unintentionally wear the same clothes. Nevertheless, his birthday is May 11 so he had a card game at his house on Friday night. We played dealer’s choice and much to my surprise, I did pretty good winning $35. In fact, I was the “big winner”; in other words I won more than anybody else. Since I had gone out the night before, I was kinda tired by midnight and also just kinda sick of playing. So, I went home.

Yesterday I got my oil changed. I love going to Jiffy Lube, they always seem to have the hottest guys working there. As it turned out though, they got a whole bunch of new employees and none of them were hot. As if that wasn’t bad enough, they also didn’t seem to be very good at their jobs either. For example, when I pulled into the garage, my car sat for about 15 minutes and outside of them opening the hood, they did nothing to it. Finally they got started on it and it seemed to take forever for them to not only change my oil but also to rotate my tires. At one point 2 of them debated whether they actually put oil in my car. I always watch my car like a hawk when I get my oil changed, so I knew they had already added it. Next as they were putting my hub caps back on the dude doing it said to another one of the dudes that he heard something on the tire, like some kind of grinding. One of the other guys said that “its not your problem, its probably something with the roader”. They didn’t bother to tell me that though, although my brakes have been making noise and they are probably due for a change.

Since today is John’s birthday, we decided to play Whirley Ball yesterday. Mark was supposed to come over and he, John and I were going to ride together. At the last second though, John told me that Brian was going to follow us because he did not know how to get there. So, once Mark got here we had to wait on Brian. Finally about 20 after 4, Mark and I decided to leave and have John wait for Brian. While Mark and I zoomed on up to Lombard we listened to the Cubs game. Without getting into details, Mark and I took turns making fun of the Cubs play by play guy, Pat Hughes. Don’t get me wrong, I love Pat Hughes, but yesterday we were being totally juvenile and immature in making fun of him. It was funny as hell though, as we were laughing our asses off the whole way.

We wound up having 9 people for Whirley Ball, which meant that we were one person short and would have uneven teams. In spite of this, for the most part the games were pretty close. We played 3 20 minute games. Much to my shock somehow I managed to actually score a goal in the first game. See, I suck really really bad at Whirley Ball, so me scoring is kinda like the equivalent of Paris Hilton winning an Oscar. I wound up having the fastest car on the court, which was nice and all but didn’t do a whole lot for me since I suck real bad. By the time the 2nd game finished there were a bunch of middle school kids waiting to play after we were done. I forget why but for some reason John needed to get out of his car before we started the second game. He proceeded to take one step out of the car and fell right the fuck down for not only us to see but also for the group of kids to see. It was funny as hell!

After Whirley Ball we went to Hooters for dinner. After Hooters, Jt was going to pick up Dave so he could hang with us as well, we just didn’t know where we were going to go. I suggested Brunswick Zone since it was closer to where Dave lives and since Jt had to go that way anyways, it would work for everybody. Plus, there is a very nice bar inside there complete with darts and pool. As it turned out, our cousin Tony (not my older cousin Tony who is friends with John, but my other younger cousin Tony who sometimes goes up to Clem’s) works there. Now I’m always weary about some of the stuff he says because to be honest, I think he is full of shit sometimes as he sets off my bullshit detector. I should explain how he is related to us. He is actually our second cousin, his grandpa was my dad’s brother. Anywho, he claims that his oldest uncle (my dad’s brother’s son) is not actually my uncle’s son. He said that my uncle was lost at sea during WWII and presumed dead, so after a few years his wife moved on and got knocked up by another man. During the pregnancy he reemerged and she dumped her new man in favor of him. My bullshit dectector was going off like crazy during all of this; it just sounds too crazy and far fetched to be true. Unfortunately my dad, his brother and his brother’s wife are all dead. I guess I will just have to ask my dad’s last living brother to see if he knows if its true.

Everybody was wimpy yesterday as they were all gone by 11, leaving John, Dave and I to play one last game of darts. Dave was trying to talk me into going to the casino, but I was not interested because I had lost so much money gambling last weekend. On the other hand, I always go the casino to play my mother’s favorite slots on Mother’s Day. John had no interest in going to the casino. Dave was hungry and I was trying to talk him into going to Denny’s instead. So we dropped John off at home and I headed in the direction of Denny’s. I must have made a wrong turn or 10 and wound up at the casino, a mere 30 minute drive in the complete opposite direction of Denny’s. Nevertheless, I lost again.

Today I was walking into work during lunch. I was talking with 4 coworkers as I walked into the atrium of the building. Now, normally I don’t pay that much attention to where I’m going as I walk anywhere. I tend to get easily distracted by things and in this case had my head totally turned looking at a coworkers as I spoke. This is my excuse for not seeing the rather large load bearing pillar that is located in our atrium. I walked right the fuck into it. The first part that hit was my knee. At first everybody was very concerned then they started to laugh. One of the girls just looked at me as if to say “Mike, you dope, you did that on purpose, didn’t you?” In fact, a few people asked me if I meant to do that, but honestly, I did not. As I went back upstairs I started to tell everybody what had happened. One of the guy’s who works in the mail room insisted that I had to report this. I didn’t want to as I was fine and not hurt at all. They insisted though and I found myself in the mail room with the lady who is in charge of reporting shit like this. So I had to tell her the whole embarrassing story, but I was making jokes the whole time. She even had to call the security guard because he has a report that he needs to fill out as well. He kept asking me if I need him to call the paramedics but I said no. They kept asking me if I had hit my head or face to which I replied “Geez, am I that ugly that the only way my face could look this bad is if I hit it?” I know that might sound sarcastic but I said it in a joking manner which made everybody laugh. The rest of the day the security guard kept checking on me to make sure I was ok, he said that he had to because it was his job. Of course, more and more people found out about it and they found it hilarious and they kept cracking jokes about it. Of course, I was the one leading with the jokes. I swear, sometimes it amazes me that I have managed to survive and somehow not kill myself in some sort of accidental fall or something like that. I’m such a klutz, I’m always doing stuff like this to myself, its both comical and sad at the same time…………..well more comical than anything else.  And then there is the other 4 people I was with, you mean to tell me one of them couldn’t have said “Yo, Mike you dumbass, look out for that fucking pole!” or at least grabbed me and pulled me out of the way.

None of this would of happened if Carl Weathers was my dad. If Carl Weathers was my dad, they would have thrown themselves in between the pillar and me, preventing me from walking into it. Or, if Carl Weathers was my dad the pillar would have moved the fuck out of the way when it saw me getting even remotely close.

Thinking back about the 10 year anniversary of Kerry Wood’s 20 strikeout game got me thinking about the year 1998. And I did this last year at some point as well, looking back at 1997. So, here is a look back at the year 1998.

• January 5- Sonny Bono dies when his heart stops. The heart was forced to be stopped when his body decided to direct him straight into a tree while skiing.
• January 25- The Denver Broncos won the Super Bowl. I’ve always loved Denver and John Elway has long been my favorite football player, I was excited about this.
• February 18- Cubs broadcaster Harry Caray dies.
• March 23- Undeserving Titanic wins 11 Oscars including best picture. I still have never seen the movie, but 11 Oscars? Seems like a bit much to me.
• March 24- 2 students kill 5 people and injure another 10 in Jonesboro, AR.
• March 27- Viagra is approved by the FDA. That’s right people Viagra is 10! The means it will be hitting puberty within the next few years. Does that mean the pills will get bigger?
• May14- The last episode of Seinfeld airs. To this day, it remains my 2nd favorite show of all time, right behind Blossom. Just kidding about the Blossom part.
• May 14- Frank Sinatra dies
• May 28- Phil Hartman is murdered by his wife before killing herself leaving behind a 9 year old son and a 6 year old daughter.
• June 14- The Chicago Bulls win their 6th championship in 8 years. I remember watching it at some auditorium place with a guy I used to be friends with, Rob, and a bunch of his church friends. I don’t a Chicago team will win 6 titles in 8 years again in my lifetime, I still cherish every title and remember where I was for each one. 
• August 7- Osama Bin Laden bombs 4 US embassies killing 224 people and injuring over 4,500. Bin Laden remains at large.
• October 21- The New York Yankees win the World Series, finishing a season in which they won 114 games in the regular season.
• November 3- Jesse “The Body” Ventura is elected governor of Minnesota
• December 19- President Bill Clinton is impeached for getting a blow job from Monica Lewinsky and lying about it. I remain convinced that the primary reason why he lied was so that his wife would not find out. After all, would you want to deal with Hillary’s ass after that?

The top 20 tv shows were:

Here were some of the top songs from 1998. I don’t know about you, but I can’t believe some of these songs are this old.

One Week- Bare Naked Ladies
Closing Time- Semisonic
Inside Out- Eve 6
Jump, Jive and Wail- Brian Setzer Orchestra (remember when this new version of swing music as all the rage)
Zoot Suit Riot- Cherry Poppin Daddies
I Don’t Want To Miss A Thing- Aerosmith
Time Of Your Life (Good Riddance)-Green Day
Gettin’ Jiggy With It- Will Smith
Fly Away- Lenny Kravitz
My Own Prison- Creed (I HATE creed, but I put that one on here for Randy and Heather)
Jumper- Third Eye Blind

Movies released in 1998

Saving Private Ryan (the highest grossing movie of 1998)
Armageddon
There’s Something About Mary
The Big Lebowski
Rounders
Rushmore
The Wedding Singer
The Opposite of Sex
American History X

As for my life in February1998, after nearly 2 1/2 years I found a permanent job. I know it sounds bad to be unemployed for that long, but shit, I was living at home. Shit, that makes it sound even worse. In March Jt and drove to the Baseball Hall of Fame and then to New York City. 1998 was a huge baseball year for me. In addition to Wood’s 20 strikeout game, 1998 was the year of the great home run race between Scammy Sosa and Mark McGwire. We even went as far as to go to Milwaukee for  a Cardinals-Brewers game on September 18th to see him hit a homerun. Of course now we know that it was all a sham as both players were hopped up on steroids. But at the time, it was very exciting, almost a surreal experience. The Cubs even went to the playoffs that year, only to get swept by the Atlanta Braves.

We took several trips that year, also went to St Louis in August in addition to our annual camping trip at Shotgun Eddy’s in Wisconsin. After the events of the previous year at Shotgun, somehow Dave managed to get himself invited back for 1998, I think his dating Kelli had a lot to do with it.  Jt also turned 21 that year which resulted in a 3 day, 3 state gambling trip for Jt, Dave and I. Jt and I went to the Harrah’s in Joliet at midnight on July 28. We woke up the next morning and Dave, Jt and I went to a riverboat in Indiana to gamble some more. The day after that we drove out to Bettendorf, Iowa to complete our three state tour.

Towards the end of the year, I had an idea for my siblings and I to chip in give my mother a Christmas gift of a trip to California to see her brothers. We also sent my sister along with her. Turned out to be a great thing as it was the last time my mother got to see her brothers, as she died a little more than  year later. This was the last time I ever got my mother a gift. See, she had always complained about the gifts we got her. I figured that this would be such a great gift that she would finally have a gift that she loved. In early December we told her that she would be going on her trip from the day after Christmas until January 2nd. She was so excited and very happy. At the time, my mom ran a daycare in the house and never took vacations, she was always worried that she would lose clients if she took time off. But, we managed to convince her that a week off right around the holidays would be fine. Now my mom’s evil to the core sister used to come here and help my mom babysit the kids in the day care. A couple of weeks before her trip, I got in a pretty heated argument with that cold hearted bitch because she called my sister a fat pig. I’m getting ahead of myself here. See, my mom and her sister used to hit the kids. I never liked that and it would always cause problems if I saw them do this. Well, my sister (who worked for my mom as well) said something to the evil bitch after she hit one of the kids. That is when she called my sister a fat pig and I came in and really started yelling at her for the hitting and for calling her a fat pig. Well, this caused a huge problem with my mom. She got very pissed and like the fucking baby she was, refused to go on the trip, in addition, she stopped talking to me. After a couple of days, the daughter of my mother’s evil to the core sister called me and started yelling at me because of the fight I had with her mother. I remember I just kept saying “are we going to talk this through like a couple of adults or are you going to sit here and yell at me?”. After a while, she calmed down. She said that she felt it would go a long way of making things right with my mother if I apologized to her mother for the fight. Now keep in mind that I HATE my mother’s evil to the core sister with every fiber of my being. But, for the greater good, I did what I had to do and long story short, my mom changed her mind and went on her trip. Much like my mother though, I hold grudges and after that whole thing I said that my mother never appreciates any of the things we buy for her and I swore that I would not buy her another thing until her funeral. A year later, she was dead. Oh, and I kept my promise.

With my mom out of town, Mark, John and I had a huge New Year’s Eve bash here at the house. This would turn out to be one of our bigger bashes, if I had to guess I would say we had about 50 people at our party. It was a great time though.

That was 1998. It doesn’t seem that long ago, does it?

Christie’s brother Tony gave me a quote on replacing my roof over the weekend. It turns out that much of the wood that is underneath my shingles and that makes up my roof is warped and will need to be replaced. Although it is going to cost me a ton of money, in all honesty it is less than I thought it would be. He claims that he and his crew should be able to finish it in a day, maybe 2, depending on if he has a whole crew and how the weather is. I now have to get a permit from the village. Also to add injury to insult (or should it be injury to a big fucking bill) I somehow managed to snip the siding on my garage while I was mowing the lawn the other day leaving a corner of the garage with the siding off and the plywood exposed and I can’t seem to fix it. I probably wouldn’t of even had this problem if Carl Weathers was my dad. We’ll be right back after this commercial break.

                                  His voice has been compared to nails on a chalkboard.
                                  When people see him walking down the street they run and hide so they can avoid interacting with him.
                                  Spending time with him is a form of torture for detainees at GITMO.
                                  His last employer sent him on an all expenses paid vacation so that he would stop annoying his co-workers.
                                  He isn’t married but if he were married his wife would file for divorce on grounds of massive annoyance.
                                  He is the most annoying person in the world.
                                   “I don’t always drink wine, but when I do, I prefer Boone’s Farm.”

Ok, we’re back. Today was the 10th anniversary of Kerry Wood’s 20 strikeout game tying the Major League record.  I still remember the game like it was yesterday. Of course, it helps that I’ve seen the replay on tv a few times since then. I remember I was off work that day and had not had a chance to even turn on the game until the 5th inning just in time to see him get his 10th strikeout. A couple innings later, the strikeout train rolled on and first I called Jt and then I called John to see if they were watching or listening to the game. Wood was as dominant as any pitcher that I had ever seen before or since.  In the next week’s Sports Illustrated, they wrote that it very well might have been the best game ever pitched. I don’t know if I agree with them, but honestly its tough to put up much of an argument. It wasn’t a no hitter, but the only hit was a scratch hit that didn’t even leave the infield and the next batter hit into a double play.  He didn’t walk anybody. I remember watching and getting nervous as I watched the 9th inning, as he went into the 9th with 18 strikeouts. Although the game was amazing, in all honesty, Wood has not amounted to much since. We have all waited for years for him to become something more, but it just isn’t meant to be. Sure, we Cub fans all love Wood, but he is pretty much just an average pitcher and not nearly close to the potential he showed that game. We love Wood because he never gives up, always gives 100% and loves the Cubs and wants to be here to help them win. I wish that history had been much kinder to him, he deserves it.

You know, I wonder what my life would have been like if my mom had been knocked up by Carl Weathers. I mean, its not like she didn’t have the chance. After all, they both lived in the United States at the time of my conception. I betcha I would have been much more…………..uhhhhh………………Weathery? I mean, the dude was Apollo fucking Creed for shit’s sake, that’s gotta be good for something, right? Boy, just one I wish my mom would of been into black dudes instead of being somewhat racist. Just think, I could have been Michael Weathers………….at least after I sued him for back child support and took his name.

So have you all heard about this dude who wants to change his name to In God We Trust? Honestly, he does. And to make matters even worse, its not like he is from the south. He is from fucking Illinois! Geez, what an embarrassment. His reasoning is that he fears the government wants to take the phrase “In God We Trust” off of the US currency. Why the fuck should he care?  I mean after all, isn’t money the literally and figuratively the dirtiest thing in the world? Is that something you really want your God to be associated with? Then again its none of my business of some dip shit wants to change his name to In God We Trust, Fucky McFuckington, Dick Pole or Beaver McCracken, he is the one who is going to have to go through all the paperwork only to have people making fun of him the rest of his life.

Oh, by the way, obviously all of those names are made up. Except for Dick Pole. He used to be a baseball player and is currently the pitching coach for the Cincinnati Reds.

I was also reading tonight that people have started to pray for gas prices to come down? Honestly, you really think prayer is going to work? Really? Here is a novel thought, why not do something useful and USE LESS GAS!!! Yo, Reverend Speedsalot, how about instead of driving that big ass fucking Escalade you try riding a bike to go fuck one of your parishioners? Oh and Mr Pope guy, maybe its time to trade the Popemobile in for a car that gets better gas mileage, that thing can’t get anymore than 20 miles to the gallon at the most. Maybe instead of praying,  you fuckers instead should write letters to the oil corrupted president you put in office.

And speaking of oil and high gas prices, it all ties in with the food riots that have been going on around the world. Can you imagine………….people rioting for food. What ever happened to rioting only when teams win championships or when the verdict of a trial doesn’t go your way? Those fuckers in other countries rioting over food. You people are only doing it to try to make us look bad for us rioting over stupid shit. No, no, no, don’t you even try to say you are hungry and you need food, after all we have plenty of food in America, after all why do you think over 50% of our population are a bunch of fat asses. You are only making a big stink and rioting to make us Americans look bad. I say get over it and eat a fucking Big Mac already.

Seriously though, the world is going through a food shortage and as I alluded to above, it is related to the high price of oil. See, oil is bad for the environment. Also its in high demand and the oil companies are evil so the price of oil has sky rocketed. The one thing we all agree on is we need to get off oil. So the solution for a lot of people? Ethanol, which is corn based fuel. Because of this, there is less corn to go around. Also, farmers are trying to grow more corn and therefore they are growing less wheat, soybeans and other things. The stuff that they do grow is being eaten by cows and other animals. This of course, is leaving less food to go around and not only causing food prices to sky rocket but also to have shortages of things like rice and many other things leading to the aforementioned food riots. People are starving Yes, this all looks very bleak but there are things you can do to help make a difference.

1. For starters use less gas. That should be a given and if you don’t know that by now then you are too stupid for the world’s greater good. You deserve to never drive again.

2. Eat less meat. I’m not saying to flat out become a vegetarian, I’m just saying to cut back. The less meat we eat the less food we have to give to cows and other animals. The farmers would not have to grow as much feed for their animals and therefore can grow more food for humans. Also, and I’m not making this up, but the methane from cow farts is contributing significantly to global warming.

3. Don’t waste. That goes for food and oil. If you don’t think you are going to eat as much, don’t cook as much food or don’t order as much food when eating out. As for oil, its a waste to let your car warm up before driving it. Sure, its not cold out right now so this is not much of an issue. But  in the wintertime how long does it honestly take for your car to warm up and for the heat to take effect? What, maybe 5 minutes at the most. You should be able to tough it out for 5 minutes.

As for the ethanol, I learned a few years ago (and I think I even posted on it) that sugar is the cleaner and better alternative than corn is for fuel. As Bill Maher said, we need to stop putting the sugar into our bodies and start putting it into our cars.

Damn. Today was a lost day. Literally. Originally I wanted to go to Arlington Park, as they were going to have a live simulcast of the Kentucky Derby. In fact they were billing it as the world’s largest Kentucky Derby party, at least outside of Kentucky. I was unable to talk this guy from work into going and Dave was unable to go as well. So, Dave and I did the next best thing: we went to Booker Magee’s, an off track betting place in Joliet. We went there last year to bet on the Derby, but this year we were able to get there earlier and therefore were able to bet on more races. This would turn out to not be a good thing.

I picked up Dave about 12:30 and after a brief stop at Walgreen’s got to the OTB place shortly after one. Although I would stop short of saying it was packed, there were a lot of people there. And as the afternoon wore on, eventually it was packed. Whoever said horse racing is dead was sorely mistaken. In fact the Churchill  Downs  crowd of 157,770 was the 2nd largest in the 134 year history of the Kentucky Derby. I say it every year to Dave, one of these years I’m going to actually go to the Derby. It might not be next year or the year after that, but of these years I’m going to go.

Anywho, we started by betting some of the races at Arlington. In one of the races, the horse Dave bet on lost in a photo finish, it was literally by a nose. Later on we had both bet on another long shot that barely lost as well. I also had another race in which I bet a trifecta box (meaning I bet on three horses to finish in any order of the top 3) and I came within a head of winning that as well, which would have paid off nicely. As it stood, I only one one race which really wasn’t a win at all as I still lost $4 on that race. I did however see  a couple of girls I work with there including a lady who was my direct boss before I got promoted and transferred out of her unit. She is nice though I like her.

At 3:40 Dave told me that he had told Kelli that he would be home by 2:30. Classic Dave. What made it even funnier is that we still didn’t leave after that. While we were in line to bet on the Derby, about 4 in the pm, Kelli called my phone as Dave is without a phone right now. Because it was loud as hell in there, Dave said “Don’t answer it, I’ll call her back later.” Only one problem. I had already pressed talk. So, I just hung up the phone. A minute later I got a text from Kelli asking Dave to call. We placed our bets and headed home. On the way to the car, Dave called her back. She was pissed because, as you might have guessed, she heard him say not to answer the phone. Oh Dave. When will you ever learn.

Although I’m not positive because I didn’t keep track, but I’m guesstimating that I lost about $50 there. Only problem is that my day wasn’t over. I still played cards at Scott’s house. It really wasn’t my day because I was the second person out in the first game and the first person out in the second game. I hope that didn’t confuse you, but in case it did, let me just make it simple, it basically means that I got my fucking ass kicked.

Oh well. At least the Cubs won today.

So is anybody else besides me sick and damn fucking tired of hearing about Jeremiah Wright? Furthermore I think I have grown weary of the whole Democratic primary race. But back to Wright, is there any way Obama can have this guy fucking killed? He just won’t shut the fuck up already. Honestly, I really believe at this point that he wants Obama to lose. Seriously. Why else would he keep saying the shit he is saying. The ironic part though is that for over 200 years blacks have waited for a viable black candidate that had an honest and actual chance to win an election. For years we have heard that if a black person came close to being president a racist white person would kill him or her. Herein lies the irony. Ultimately, this black candidate who we have waited so many years for is going to be taken down by another black man. Honestly, I’d hate to say it, but the way things stand right now, I firmly believe that the Democrats have no chance to win the election. If you think they do than that’s great and all but I think you might have your head in the sand or might be in denial. Let’s not forget a few things. First of all, the Republicans are evil, pure fucking evil. The will stop at nothing to win an election. Also, never underestimate the stupidity of the American people. Need proof? Just look back at 2004, Bush put the bait out there that the false threat of gay marriage was worse than the real threat of terrorist or the problems in Iraq and the American people took the bait. Don’t think for one second that America won’t be dumb enough to fall for the Republicans shit again. Another reason is that the Democrats are stupid. Very very very stupid. As brilliantly evil the Republicans are the Democrats are just as incompetent and stupid. The Democrats are kind of like the Cubs of politics; they could blow a 3 games to 1 lead in a best of 7 series. And the Democrats had a very popular and electable candidate in Obama and they have fucked that up to the point where he probably has no chance at the nomination. A lot of that has to do with Wright. Some has to do with Obama. Some of it has to do with the calculating, conniving, cold hearted bitch Hillary Clinton. Some of it has to do with the gullibility of the American people. Either way, all of it adds up to a Democrat loss.

Yes, I say the Democrats will lose if Hillary wins the nomination. She is too polarizing, especially after the way she has campaigned against Obama. And the Republicans have TONS of stuff they can use (most of it probably made up or embellished) to Swift Boat her. People have been calling for her to drop out. As much as I don’t like her and probably will not vote for her against McCain (don’t worry, I wouldn’t vote for him either. If its the 2 of them than Libertarian and former Democrat Mike Gravel is my man), I never thought she should drop out. When you have campaigned this long and put this much of your blood, sweat, tears and money into a campaign and are this close, you don’t quit. If she had lost Ohio, Texas or Pennsylvania, then one can make a strong argument that she was too far behind to stay in the race. But, the fact remains that she won all of them so why should she quit? That being said, she sure as hell doesn’t need to do McCain’s job for him. She shouldn’t be saying things like she said a couple of months ago about how the only two candidates qualified to lead the country are herself and McCain.

The other thing that is so damn frustrating is that this whole process is taking way too long. These two have been campaigning for well over a year. When its all said and done and one of them wins the nomination, they would have been campaigning against each other and their own party’s candidate for probably a year and a half and only campaigning against McCain for what, four or 5 months at best. Does that make any sense? How can you spend that much time going against somebody in your own party and then have to turn around and either support them or ask for their support? Shouldn’t they spend a year going against the Republican candidate? It doesn’t make sense I tell you.

I swear, I would never want to run for president. This whole thing is so exhausting and grueling for these candidates that I have to wonder about the sanity of any of them, especially knowing that the easy part is running and winning and the hard part doesn’t even start until you take office. Honestly, you have to be at least a little bit nuts to want to be president. I know it comes with all sorts of power but at what cost?