August 29, 2011

• All Beered Out

  Am I the only one who is sick of beer commercials? I suspect I am, seeing as they are so damn popular. And if I'm not the only one sick of them, chances are an overwhelming majority of straight males love them and can't get enough of them. Of course, they are specifically made for and pandered to the straight male so naturally they would love them. But for the rest of us.................well fuck.

  It's not even that they are cliched but they are also really fucking dumb. They make it seem like the beer is the most important thing ever. Okay, so I guess that is what a good ad is supposed to do, but they go way the fuck over the top with it. Oh, look at this, my beer is the most important thing in my life; I'm willing to totally fuck over my friends and family for a fucking Buttweiser. Or then there is the ever popular ads in which they try to make it seem like the beer makes all of the socially acceptable rules for the male society. Or how guys act like total fucking doucheheads when they are around each other.

  Now I'm not saying there aren't some good beer ads. I'm just saying that a majority of them suck giant donkey ass. And because of this attitude the beer commercials have, it has spread to guys actually believing how important beer is. Look, we can get drunk on anything; it doesn't have to be beer. And no matter how amazing beer is (and it's not..............it happens to kinda taste like piss at times) it is and will always be a long distance second to orgasms.

  All I'm saying is that these companies need to come up with better and more original ads. All of them seem to be the same; dumbass guys doing stupid shit to get a lame fucking beer while a hot chick watches. Enough already. I guess the main culprits in all of this are Miller and Budweiser. They need to find ways to be more original like those great Dos Equis commercials with the Most Interesting Man In the World.

  • 10:09 pm
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