September 28, 2011

• Michaelscope!

  Every now and then I like to do a post about myself. Perhaps it's because I'm self involved, self centered and a bit narcissistic. Or maybe it's because I get new readers and like to kinda reintroduce myself every now and then. Or maybe I see somebody else do a similar post about themselves and I steal the idea from them. Of course it could also be because I have nothing to write about. Or maybe it is just a combination of all of the above. But, here are some facts that you might not know about me that you wouldn't know unless you actually knew me.

  • The only time I'm ever late is for my period. I HATE being late for anything. My thinking is that I don't like to keep people waiting as I know how much I hate to be kept waiting. I'm not just on time, but normally I'm chronically early with everything I do. Even when I don't work overtime at work, I'm still 20-30 minutes early. If I'm invited to a party, I show up right on time; for example if the invite says anytime after two, well I'm there at two. I like to party so usually I'm the first one there and the last to leave. I don't overstay my welcome though; I will usually leave within minutes of the previous person leaving.
  • I have not missed a day of work in nearly four years, Monday November 19, 2007 to be exact. I don't mean to toot my own horn (although I would if I could) but I'm about as reliable as the sunrise and sunset. This was one of the things that my mom really instilled in us; we don't miss school unless we were dead. Well, that attitude stood with me as I became an adult and joined the workforce.
  • I've never admitted this on here, but I live in my parents old house. Pathetic, no? I guess you can say I kinda waited things out, but honestly it's not much of a wait when one of the parents (my dad) dies when you are four. Shit, that's half the battle right there! My mom got cancer when I was 23 and died a few months after I turned 24. I remember before she got sick, I was thinking about moving out, but once she got sick, things changed. And it's not like I totally freeloaded into the house; when she died she still owed something like $130,000 on the house.
  • Back in the October of 1997, I got a job working in a haunted house. It was actually a haunted clown house and I actually wasn't working inside the house but outside of it. My job was to let customers into the house and entertain people in the line. I was half-assed dressed like a clown, meaning I wore a clown wig, a clown suit and clown shoes but no make up. I developed my own character in which I would heckle people in the line by yelling at them, taunting them, and making fun of them. I was totally pompous and obnoxious. I called myself "Heckels The Clown" (intentionally misspelling the name) and it was the most fun job I've ever had. Too bad it was only temporary and paid just $6 an hour.
  • I'm generally a night owl, although 11 months of overtime have forced me into going to bed much earlier then I like. My energy level peaks at night and usually it takes me 20-45 minutes to fall asleep each night and often times I wake up and have trouble falling back to sleep. I do like being up late though.

  So there now you know just a little bit more about me. What's that, you don't give an ever living shit? Well fuck you, I mean would it fucking kill you to a least pretend to care? Just fucking humor me a little bit, would ya?

  Wait. Did I just say that I get a period?

  • 10:27 pm
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