January 18, 2005

• Today at work our computers were down for most of the morning……….made for a very very busy afternoon.

  I’ve really got nothing, so I guess I will take questions from the audience now. You in the back, do you have a question?

  In case you didn’t hear, the question was “When will I ever do
  something about that 10 pound goyter on my back?” Well, I can answer
  that one: The same day you do something about that odor coming from the
  mid section of your body. Next question.

  I will repeat the question “Do I think Barry Bonds is on steroids?”
  Well, I think its fairly obvious he is. I mean, his body is completly
  mis shappen. His arms are the size of his legs. His head, the size of a
  beach ball, and his penis? Well, lets just say he compensating with a
  bigger bat.

  The next question is “Who do I think will be winning Oscars this year?”
  Well, lets just say Vin Diesel and Heather Graham better not get their
  hopes up. Also, something tells me “Catwomen” and “The Village” won’t
  be runaway winners either.

  Next question is from Tom in Forest Park, and he wants to know “Who
  will win the Super Bowl?” Well Tom, don’t ask me, I had the 49ers and
  the Dophins meeting in the big game. But, feel free to ask my friend
  Dave……….I’m sure he thinks it will be the Padres and the 76ers.

  We have time for one last question. Bill in the front what is your
  question? What? I won’t repeat that question…………..he told me he
  was a chick, I swear……….and I didn’t even know about his
  fetish…………thats it, this interview is over!

  • 10:33 pm
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